Thursday, January 16, 2014

Enter Drama




Yes, Ron and I broke up. Early December last year. Nothing new there, I think everybody knows by now. Had emotional breakdowns via social media so everyone pretty much has an idea. I promised myself though that as much as possible, I will be prim and proper and will not wash my (and my ex's) dirty linen in public. At least, I will spare the nitty-gritty details for myself and for close friends. And probably for people I'll never meet again. Hopefully.

I think for the past few weeks, I've been doing quite well. The new year celebration had been a welcome closure. It ended my terribly stressful 2013 and gave me hope for a better year ahead. Though honestly, 2013 had been a banner year for my career. I became a fixture in important corporate affairs meetings and activities in the company that even top management began to realize my contributions.

My family and friends are largely responsible for the bright outlook I've been sporting lately. They had been with me through every drunken stupor, every thankfully-foiled attempt to contact my ex, and every alcohol-powered buckets of tears I shed. Wallowing in sadness and self-pity is such an easy task, but family and friends do make sure you get up and out of that bottomless pit of sorrow and despair.

Yes, I am well. I've been doing my best to breathe in positivity every damn day. But there are times when a chill, a familiar pang of pain comes creeping in. And it's no longer because my ex abandoned me when I needed him the most. It's the feeling of emptiness that's been haunting me lately. Not as painful and heartbreaking as the first wave, but it lingers like the moon on a sunny day. You know it's there even when it's bright and dandy, and you'll eventually feel its presence when you're alone at night.

I know it won't last long and sooner or later, I'd be back up again. But while the feeling still lingers, I'll be writing here.

It's good to be back.